Hindsight
- by L.A. Law
- Posted on November 16, 2017
Many of us have experienced emotional trials from childhood and one of the ways we go about healing those traumas is to make things better for our own children. That seems to be the natural progression, to make life better for those that come after you. But where do we draw the line? How do we limit what we give our children when we have more than we need? Can we recognize when we have more than we need? Do we make things so much better that our children don’t have any struggles? Then when life hits them with “life” they fall apart? Have they developed the skills to rise to the occasion, to meet life straight in the eye and say yeah, ok this sucks but I will get through it? We all want to provide our kids everything they need. Blessed are those who can do just that, and nothing more.
And maybe that was the norm back in the 1970’s when I was growing up. I had everything I needed but never any excess. I wasn’t starving and I wasn’t fat. I ate lunch at school but I couldn’t even so much as chew gum in class, let alone have a snack. I know, as a parent we want to correct any unpleasantness from our childhood so maybe we go overboard. We make sure our kids have not only a lunch, but 3 snacks, a juice, a Gatorade, a water bottle (hopefully now refillable) and an extra sandwich to take to after school sports. In comparison, I had lunch and drank from the water fountain, and only a sip because it was disgusting, staying till 5:00 to twirl my rifle.
I am not saying my experience was better or correct. There are lots of memes out there on social media glamorizing growing up in the ‘free form’ way that I did, and I appreciate all of the lessons I had to learn the hard way and I tried to teach them to my children the “easy” way. They may have learned one or two. I feel like the real answers to life are somewhere in the middle, striking the perfect balance. But if you can slingshot your way within eyesight of that, than you are winning life. By the way, you will only see if you hit that target in hindsight.
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Many of us have experienced emotional trials from childhood and one of the ways we go about healing those traumas is to make things better for our own children. That seems to be the natural progression, to make life better for those that come after you. But where do we draw the line? How do…